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Tuesday 2nd of December
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JOKE OF THE DAY - 27-08-2008

It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes  harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they  were younger.  When you notice this, try not to shout at them. Some are  over-sensitive and there's nothing worse than an over-sensitive woman.

My name is Ron. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife,
  Julie. When I took early retirement last year, it became necessary for Julie  to get a full-time job for the extra income that we need.

Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her
  age. I now usually get home from the pub about the same time she gets home  from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she nearly always says she  has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't shout  at her, instead I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets  dinner on the table. I generally have lunch at the pub so eating out again  is out of the question; I'm ready for some home cooked food when I get home.

She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's usual
  for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can  by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't  clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to  motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of ageing is complaining. For example, she will say that it
  is difficult for her to do the shopping during her lunch hour. But we take  them for better or worse, so I just smile   and  offer encouragement. I tell  her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have  to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and  then won't hurt her. I like to think tact is one of my strong points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She
  has to take a rest when she has only half finished mowing the lawn and  several extra breaks when she's vacuuming through the house. It does annoy  me, vacuuming when I'm trying to watch my favorite program, but I try not to  make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to make herself a nice cup of tea  and just sit for a while, and as long as she is making one for herself, she  may as well make one for me too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Julie. I'm not
  saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it  difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how  frustrating women get as they get older. However, even if you just use a  little more tact and less criticism of your ageing wife because of this  article, I will consider that writing it was well  worthwhile. After all, we  are put on this earth to help each other, eh?


EDITOR'S NOTE:

Ron died suddenly last week. He was found with a 24-inch Stanley screwdriver  rammed up his **** with only 2 inches showing.

His wife Julie was arrested, but the all-woman jury accepted her defence  that he accidentally sat on it

Please e-mail me with any jokes you would like to see here.   noel@citylocal.co.uk

 

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